Evidence A: A friend of mine texted me out of the blue the other night and after a short conversation was like ” You’re so beautiful and driven, I’m surprised you haven’t been taken off the market yet.”
My internal monologue to that semi-complimentary dig went a little like this:
“Well first…I’m not a piece of meat that some random guy can just pick up and pay a dowry for and expect great things to happen out of it. I’m also not a prize so easily won, because I am picky as fuck.”
Evidence B: A friend of mine that used to go to my school last year sent me a random late night e-mail (are you sensing a trend yet?) that said that if he wasn’t with his current girlfriend that he would “totally” date me, and his girlfriend who I might add is the sweetest person on this green Earth.
My internal monologue to this one:
“That sounds familar…oh yeah a line very close to that was delivered to me by my now ex boyfriend last year at a bar after he had just drank an entire two pitchers worth of beer in one gulp. Way to be, asshole. My once great opinion of you now has been damaged.”
I am reminded on a near constant basis that I am not apart of a couple, some days it sucks and I get a little distraught on the inside, but that still doesn’t discourage me from attempting to ask a guy out now and then. For example, this weekend I asked a friend of mine to be my Dutch Date to go see The Great Gatsby with some friends of mine when it comes out next month. Sadly, I’m still waiting for an answer that at this point I’m just going to go ahead and take as a flat out “No”. Which kind of sucks, but it’s not the worst thing.
One day I’ll find someone that can match up to my somewhat unreasonably high standards, there is a really high chance that they aren’t going to be found where I am now. But I have short-term goals that I would like to see accomplished sooner than later and with minimal distractions bothering me so that I can make room for the long-term ones.
Besides I tend to do better on my own for the most part. I’m resourceful and I know who to call if I get myself into a pickle.
This is the part where I contradict every word that I’ve already said about being an independent, single, driven woman but at least I’m being honest, even if it is a tad confusing. It would be great to have someone to order takeout with, get drunk with and cuddle on the couch with while watching movies. It would also be great to have someone that is almost my personal cheerleader and me their’s. I want someone to cheer for and share experiences with. I want to fall in love and be fallen in love with.
The things that I’m asking for really aren’t that much. Then again, maybe they are.